Ask anyone who has ever dislocated a limb and they’ll probably say the same thing: It sucks. They’ll likely also say that it hurts like hell.
And it’s not just the pain of the torn appendage that’s disconcerting. There’s also a hefty amount of shock in seeing a body part moved to somewhere it shouldn’t be. For a few, wild seconds, it can be awfully frightening.
Several years ago I was changing the strings on my guitar when I dislocated my thumb. Pressing down on a pair of wire cutters, the top half of my prized phalange suddenly slid out of place, forming a curious skin and bone blob where the knuckle should have been. A sickening wave of warmth and pain began washing over me as my foggy brain began processing the gravity of my misplaced digit.
“Ow, fuck,” I mumbled, before emitting a weird uncontrollable giggle that lasted approximately five minutes.
Luckily, the wayward piggy was easily pushed back into place. The swelling was minimal, and a couple of hours later I was playing onstage with my band.
We can all agree: Dislocating anything on your body pretty much sucks. But what if it happens to you while your band is headlining a Friday night rager and you are about to rip out a mid-set face-melter?
Just ask Dylan Evans.
A member of Saskatoon’s Fancy Diamonds, Evans was on stage when his knee popped out of place, leaving him with an uncooperative patella in front of a venue full of gawky-eyed looky-loos and party animals.
“A few songs in and I was bending over backwards getting ready to play a solo and suddenly I felt something I had never felt before. That was my knee popping out of the socket…”
Never mind the fact that Fancy Diamonds are busy gearing up for their western Canadian Sparkle Party tour, or dropping a super freaky skeleton video – which, incidentally, is a blast of kitschy sunshine paired with party antics and power ballad glee. But dislocating your knee hurts. It hurts a lot, actually, especially paired with a public spectacle. But, just to make sure, we decided to ask Evans how he really felt:
Ominocity: Popping your knee out of whack is probably not a lot of fun. What happened anyway?
Dylan Evans: We were the last band to play that evening and we had already had a few beers. Anyway, a few songs in and I was bending over backwards getting ready to play a solo and suddenly I felt something I had never felt before. That was my knee popping out of the socket.
It felt very sharp. I felt where it went off to the side and I knew I couldn’t bend it. My knee just looked broken and wrong. It sobered me up pretty quickly. So I started punching it and it popped it back into place on stage. There was a lot of pain but I managed to finish the song.
OM: Oucher-doo! Did you go to the hospital?
DE: Eventually. I mentioned to the audience that we might not be able to finish the set and I think some people thought I was joking. But I got some ice and a chair we finished and managed to play the songs twice as fast. And then after the set I was given a ride to the hospital.
OM: The show must go on. What about the upcoming tour?
DE: We are still going ahead with the shows. I’m in a splint right now, but I have enough time to recover before the next show. I need to watch a bit more of what I am doing from now on. I was moving around quite a bit. I guess when your leg is bent and then you twist is where you run into problems.
So now I gotta find some new dance moves.
Check out Fancy Diamonds on tour starting May 5 at Amigos in Saskatoon.